HEARTS CAN PHYSICALLY BREAK

THIS IS A NOTE THAT JENNIFER WROTE TO ME ONE MORNING AFTER WE HAD A DISAGREEMENT THE NIGHT BEFORE.  SHE WAS STILL IN GRADE SCHOOL.  SHE HAD ONE OF THE MOST TENDER HEARTS I HAVE EVER KNOWN.  SHE WROTE ME NOTES AND CARDS HER WHOLE LIFE.  AS I SAID IN ONE OF HER MEMORIALS - SHE DIDN'T DESERVE THE WAY SHE WAS TREATED IN THIS LIFE AND I AM SURE SHE IS CHERISHED WHERE SHE IS NOW.


TODAY IS MARCH 7, 2014
TODAY WOULD HAVE BEEN JENNIFER'S 43 BIRTHDAY


DAVE AND MOM LOVES YOU BABY

NOVEMBER 24, 2010



TRUTH



My husband and I went to the front door to let Captain Greg O'Halloran, of the Olathe, Kansas Police Department and another officer in the house with the hope that they located Jennifer and she was okay.



Captain O'Halloran said they had found my baby and she was dead.  I can't describe or put into words what that felt like.  I thought I was going to faint.  Everything went fuzzy and my chest felt so tight that I could not breathe.  And then an ache in my chest felt like someone had their hand on my heart and was trying to pull it out.  I became incredibly cold and wished I would turn to stone.  The house began to rotate as though a tornado was upon us.  I heard Owen yell from the kitchen and I came back to that front hall where we were all standing.


As soon as I walked into the kitchen and saw that perfect little face with ketchup all over him, I wanted to scream that they had made a horrible mistake.  Owen's mother was not dead, they were wrong.  But I didn't scream.  I sat down with him as he finished his lunch.  I was shaking uncontrollably and I told him grandma was cold.  I sat with him until he was finished with his lunch.  I took him potty and got him ready for his nap.  We did our usual ritual before nap time.  After he was done in the potty he brushed his teeth with his Thomas the Train electric toothbrush and washed his hands with his purple foaming soap.  We went to round up his dinosaurs so they would be by his bed when he got up.  Had to call grandpa into his room for kisses.  I kissed him and told him I loved "grandma's baby".  His little eyes fluttered and he was asleep.  Only then did I sit by his bed and silently sobbed into my hands.  I cried for Jennifer and her broken heart and for our baby, Owen who would never know how much she loved him.  And I cried for Dave and I knowing we would never see Jennifer alive again and knew we would have to fight to ever get to see Owen again.  I was right.


I finally got up and went into the living room where Dave and O'Halloran and the other officer was.  My first question was were they sure it was Jenny.  There was no doubt.  I asked them if Natalie Bright had anything to do with it and where was she at this time.  They said that she had nothing directly to do with it and that she was at the City of Olathe, Kansas Police Department.


I asked them to tell us what happened.  Evidently, when Jennifer left work on Tuesday, November 23, 2010 at noon she drove to Hillsdale Lake in Miami County, Kansas.  She parked on Jayhawker Drive.  They said she smoked and drank orange pop for hours.  She had the car running and the radio on.  She lined up her Olathe, Kansas Police Department Badge on the dashboard along with her phone and wallet.  Though they could not pinpoint the exact hour, Jennifer lifted her gun to her right temple and pulled the trigger.


All I wanted was for them to leave and leave us alone.  Jennifer could not stand Captain Greg O'Halloran and for him to be the one sitting there discussing her death with us was something she never would have wanted.  But they didn't leave.  Seems like they were there for hours telling us not to talk to any reporters or TV stations that might contact us. 


The phone rang, it was Natalie Bright.  Her first question was "how could Jenny do this"?  She told me she loved me and I almost threw-up.  I was being stared at by O'Halloran, so I said "I love you too" and hung up.  I was praised for saying that so as not to cause trouble.  Like Natalie Bright mattered.  For Dave and I Natalie Bright was the devil that walked among us.  Our baby was dead and we had to make sure we didn't hurt Natalie Bright.  They said she had contacted her brother, Danny Bright so he could come and be with her.  I always have wondered if they gave each other the high-five when he got there.


O'Halloran asked us if we wanted to take care of the funeral services.  That was the furthest thing from our mind.  He also asked if we could keep Owen possibly all night and I was thankful for that.  As you will find out later, we didn't have the chance to keep him.


They needed to leave so my husband and I could be alone.  Owen was still asleep.  They finally left.  I don't recall what time.


Dave and I were sitting on the sofa holding hands when we heard a truck in our driveway.  It was Natalie Bright and some woman we didn't know named Alicia Duncan.  They charged into the house and Natalie Bright sat on the floor and started her "act" of trying to cry.  She took one look at my face and changed from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde.  The transformation took less than a second.  She asked me if Jennifer told me that her brother, my son was in jail at the adult detention center where Natalie worked.  I responded with, I didn't know and Jennifer wouldn't have told me because she didn't want me to worry.


With that, Owen woke up and walked in with his blanket.  Natalie Bright grabbed him and didn't let us kiss him goodbye, and she left.